Makin' my move..

Back with the cliche titles. You know you missed it.

I am moving back to Surrey, BC as of January 31st. Couldn't be happier. I am so ready to be a Surrey girl again. Funny and true story. I was in Russia for ballet training in Grade 11, and there us girls ran into a bunch of local men who asked us where we were from. We said Canada, they asked where in Canada. We said Surrey BC. (No joke) They looked at each other, smiled and said SURREY GIRLS!!! And then asked us out. True, I swear. No one was more surprised than me that our reputation precedes us that badly. Worldwide.

Anyway, back on track here. I've been neglecting my blog to spend time on the phone with Josh, and to pack my belonging and separate them from you know who's. And no I'm not talking Voldemort. I am literally on the phone 4-5 hours a day if not more. Good thing I have unlimited text and calling anytime! Or else I'd have major bills. Josh entered my number wrong in his my 5 so he could've been actually charged $500+ for two weeks of talking. Serious.

Love.

So apart from packing he who must not be named's (sp? gr?)crap in separate boxes and figuring out what he deserves to take with him (which isn't alot), not alot going on.. trying to figure out money. Even from jail he screws me financially. Hell if he was dead he would still reach fromt he grave to fuck with me. I am in so much debt due to him. My life in a nutshell. Trust and get screwed. Luckily for me I've found someone worthy of trust. Yes, whatever I write will always come back to him, get used to it.

I've taken everything, because I am goddam entitled at this point. ENTITLED. I took the consoles, the tv, the new receiver, the wireless speaker system.. if it costs a mint, it's mine.

I also did a few bitchy things like sell all his cool electronics, his bass etc. I almost feel bad. Almost.

Honestly, I joke about it alot, but I've gone a few years now believing I couldn't do better and the bad karma I kept getting was mine and deserved what I got. It's hard to admit this without seeming self-absorbed but I am worth a hell of a lot more than this. I didn't do anything bad enough to deserve the flack I've been getting. And then now I'll probably mention that this is why there is no higher power. Bad things wouldn't happen to good people without reason. Why was my kid taken away? I have no qualms in expressing the fact that I am a fantastic mother, not perfect, but fantastic nonetheless. What did it teach me? To hate the government. Did it help me to forgive Kevin or Social Services? No. Not in the least. What did I gain? Bitterness, Hate, Resentment. What kind of God would give you that? None that I believe in. None that I would want. None that exist. That's who.

So, there's my rant.. but I'm sure there'll be more.

Laundry. BAH.

I'm not sure, but it seems lately alot of unlikely suitors have come forward to try to sleep with me (haha, I said suitors, what era is this?) I mean, Aaron Desnoyers (remember him? if you went to WWE or FP) Rob Radanovic? My god, what am I? A douche magnet? I'm intrigued and if they had said something years ago I may have even considered it. I was so lonely for like 3 years I would've taken any attention I could get. But not only did it not cross my mind, I interupted their talk of "throbbing" this and "wanting" that to talk about Josh and how great he was. (told you it would come back to him!) I don't want anyone else, and wouldn't even consider it. I may even turn down Clive Owen, if he asked. Which is saying something, because I love me some BRITISH Clive Owen. Josh is my Ron*.

* Ron is my mom's bf, she met him when she was down on her luck, they've been together 10 years. He makes her a better person, he is reliable, dependable, deep and loving. I tell my mom that I think Josh is my Ron. She laughs.

So my dad comes down to move me on Friday Night or Saturday Night. Not sure which. Probably Saturday. Hopefully sooner, for obvious reasons. My sister Annabell is coming down too. First time seeing her in person since her infancy. Wow. She's a trained babysitter (HALLELUJAH!)

I made hot v-day plans. I'd tell you, but I can't because a certain someone would spy. I used to hate Valentines Day. Maybe it's because I never had a reason to like it? I've been broken up with twice the day before Valentines Day. Hmm maybe that's why? It's too corporate. And I swear if I ever get red roses or something heart-shaped I might puke. Maybe even purposely in their direction. The thought counts, but I am a woman, not a little girl.

So, keep you posted. The move will be awesome. So psyched. SOOOOO psyched.

Mmm.. Love.

*Amz